eBay Treasure Hunting From The Sofa Has Never Revealed More Wayout Items

By Jhoana C

eBay is the place to go if you want to find practical, useful, or, let’s be honest, bizarre stuff which has no business being in your house and has no use. It is also the place where you’ll find unscrupulous characters trying their very best to con people. Think of gummy bears worth thousands and snowballs worth more than a used car. Aside from purchasing a variety of items, eBay has now also become the place to go if you want to be entertained, laugh, or get weirded out by some of the strangest listings in the world. Don’t believe us? Here’s proof compiled by an Instagram account called ebaybae. We’d like to thank her for all her efforts and for putting a smile on our faces.

#1 A very nice Steampunk keyboard we’d go into debt for

Considered a subgenre of science fiction, Steampunk incorporates aesthetics and retro-futuristic technology inspired by the steam-powered machinery of the 19th century. We’re not gonna deny it, we love everything Steampunk, and the person selling this should shut up and take our money.

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We love this keyboard so much and the only thing we hate about it is the ridiculous price. Like seriously, more than $2,000 for a keyboard? Even Apple doesn’t price their keyboard as much. How much would a kidney fetch? How appropriate would that be?!

#2 Pink is the new black

Whoever said pink is the new black probably had something to do with what is happening in this photo! It’s an overdose of pink and unless you need to see your life in neon, we advise you to keep pink to a minimum.

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All we can think of is what happens to the fur in the summer? Perhaps one small item or two made of a rosy color is fine. We must have dark souls because all we see is a pink nightmare right there.

#3 Gucci handcuffs

We all know that anything and everything that has a brand name costs a lot of money. Remember that Prada paperclip that cost $185 and the Prada nylon padded headband that was $500? Regardless of the material, as long as the name is branded, it’s going to fetch exorbitant prices.

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We have one more thing to add to that list and that is this pair of Gucci handcuffs. Priced at $1,720, can these be used on just anybody? Or can they only be used on designers who showcase high-fashion clothes on the runway?

#4 Teddy Bear pants

Before you seriously consider buying this, we urge you to think twice not only because of the price but also to think if you have any top that would go with it. Otherwise, you’d have to wear it as it is.

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Think about how inconvenient it would be when it’s a little chilly outside. Priced at almost $3,000, we think it’s a little too much for just a few teddy bear plushies stitched onto a pair of pants. We guarantee you many artists out there could do a better job for a lower price.

#5 Head not included

If you’re selling clothes, your listings get a lot more attention if someone models them. This will help prospective buyers envision how the clothes might look on them. This way a lot more buyers will be convinced to buy your product.

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However, we don’t advise you to follow what this seller did. For some reason, she thought it would be a good idea to edit the model’s face out of the picture, but she made sure that she left the rest of her body in there.  Yes, we understand that the model and his head are not included in the purchase so no need to edit him out.

#6 Not horsing around

There are many horse breeds but one of the most popular is the Arabian horse and on average it costs between $3,000 to $30,000. However, top show horses and stallions cost more, even over $120,000. That’s a lot of dough.

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This horse sculpture, on the other hand, has a price of $1,599.99 so it’s about half the cost of a live one. It seats two people conveniently and is hand-painted. To sweeten the deal, the seller has decided to throw in free shipping. Are you up for it?

#7 Nope, this is not super cute

We beg to disagree with the seller because there’s nothing cute about this. Albino baby monkeys with feet that look like that? Nope, we will pass on this one because we don’t need this in our lives. Life is already frightening as it is.

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Aside from the appearance, the price tag is also horrifying. It doesn’t matter if the seller is giving us free shipping, we’re not budging and we’re not going to change our mind unless we can think of someone close to us who loves the macabre.

#8 For when you can’t leave your work behind

Some of us are so caught up with work that we often have dreams about it. But there’s a difference between people who love nothing more but to be productive and people who don’t have any choice but to drown themselves in work.

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The person who owns and is selling this keyboard pouch seems to belong to the former category. She loves her work so much that she can’t leave it behind. We think people shouldn’t be reminded of their pending tasks when they’re out at the club having a good time.

#9 They nailed it with this pair of sandals

Believe it or not, footwear has been around for a long time. It has more than a 40,000-year history. What started as a practical venture has grown into an industry where looks are just as important as functionality. Which category do these fall into?

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The designers really nailed it with this pair of handmade sandals. It looks old but we can guarantee that it’s not ancient. They could have been just made a few days prior to look that way so they can fit in at Ren Fair.

#10 Another pair of shoes

Speaking of footwear, we have something here that supposedly belonged to Medieval times. These are supposed to be shoe covers and it’s listed for $45. It’s intriguing but we’re not opening our wallets for them because we don’t need them.

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A lot of people on the Internet think this pair would be very useful during the morning commute so people are forced to not get too close to you. They would be very helpful in clearing your path so you wouldn’t have to sweat getting to the office in time.

#11 A 14k toothpick to clean your mouth with

We have been told to floss our teeth but some people still prefer to use toothpicks. Experts say that hard wooden toothpicks can damage your gums and cause infection too. But what if we tell you that we’re offering you a 14k gold toothpick?

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Would it change your mind and convince you to ditch your floss? It resembles a small sword and even has a few embellishments. Would you get this lightly used object for only $400? It also comes with free shipping. Score.

#12 This looks like it came from a thrift store

This might look like something you’d rummage through the thrift store but it’s more than an extravagantly decorated pair of old pumps. For starters, it’s Dolce and Gabbana and it comes with intricate angel details on the back of the heels.

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The price tag is something you’d balk at too. Imagine how many pairs of regular shoes you could buy with that amount. They might look cute but they seem like they would not be comfortable to wear all day at the office.

#13 Embellished crocs

Speaking of weird footwear, we have one more pair here that has raised plenty of eyebrows. We want to say that we’re not fans of Crocs but quarantine turned us into hypocrites. Some say they are comfortable. It’s us; we say they’re comfortable.

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But this is taking them to a whole new level. So sticking a few gemstones on a pair of Crocs is enough to raise its value? We’re just going to be blunt here; the gemstones didn’t help at all. They’re pretty, though.

#14 Chanel candy necklace         

We like luxury items and if we could afford them we would certainly buy some of them but that doesn’t mean that we’re willing to splurge on all items that bear the name of a famous designer. We’re practical like that but we urge everyone to do their thing.

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That’s why the first thing that came to mind when we saw this was why should anyone spend a large amount of money on a necklace that reminds us of the chalky candy we ate as kids. We get the appeal, but we’ll pass.

#15 Just wait until the cat is out of the bag

This looks like something you would buy if you want to torture or punish your cat for being a bad kitty. The fact that it’s pink doesn’t help at all. This “grooming” bag supposedly helps with nail trimming. Just wait until the cat is out of the bag.

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Looking at it, you know it’s thinking, “You’re going to pay for this, hooman.” Whoever owns this kitty hopefully prepared himself for scratches, possible bites, and bad behavior for about a week or two. No one treats a cat this way and gets away with it.

#16 Put all your cards on the table

Now is the best time to lay all your cards on the table and for starters, you can do so by putting them on this Gucci tray designed with hearts, diamonds, spades, and clubs. It might not be the best looking but it’s worth a lot of money.

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We would never pay that much for a little plastic table because it’s too much of a gamble for us but if you bet that could recover your money back and make a little profit, by all means, go ahead and get your hands on the table.

#17 More than a thousand dollars for a top with a dog’s face

We’ve seen plenty of designer shoes on this list so now it’s time to explore other articles of clothing. This top was designed by Vivienne Westwood and has a collie printed in front. You’d think for something like this you’d pay $100 at the most.

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But you’re wrong; it is worth almost $2,000. It is not the best-looking corset we have seen and we’ll politely leave it for someone else. We’ll stick with our cat and the swirling galaxy t-shirts that are available at Walmart.

#18 Custom faux fur chair

How would you like to have this chair in your living room? We wonder what the experience would be sitting on this one. We certainly hope it’s friendly to our back and derriere considering that it’s worth a whopping $6,000.

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For that price tag, it better be like sitting on a cloud made of kittens and rainbows. But hey if you have more moolah than you need and you have nothing to splurge it on, you can consider this. It does look comfy.

#19 An alcohol container pretending to be a pretzel

This is something we would spend our money on. This cleverly designed flask pretending to be a pretzel is a work of art. No one would suspect that you have some brandy or whisky in there. People might just ask you if you can give them some of your yummy pretzel.

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But we bet they’re not going to get any. And at only $29.99, we think it’s a steal. You can bring this to a concert and no one would be the wiser. We just think that the shipping is a little pricey, but again, hand it over and take the cash.

#20 Is that a cherry in your bathroom?

We can see us having in our bathroom. If we hire a cleaning lady to tidy up the bathroom, she would spend a minute or two looking for the brush to clean the toilet with but we’re not sadistic so we’d point it out to her.

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We’d be paying her by the hour too so we couldn’t waste her time. We’re sure that she would like this cherry and would have a delightful time cleaning our toilet. Okay, that’s going too far, but it’s really cute!

#21 Your kitty in a martini

Have you ever imagined your kitty in a martini? No, we don’t mean having your kitty swim in a large martini glass, you silly goose. We mean a martini that’s closer to something in the photo below. It’s a new experience that your cat will love.

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However, your wallet or bank account might not agree with it because it costs almost $600. There is plenty of other cat furniture and cat houses out there that cost considerably less that will still be able to entertain your kitty for hours.

#22 The real Apple TV

If you’re in the market for an Apple TV, this is the real deal. This is something you could purchase and keep and before you know it, a few years from now it will be worth thousands. People really love their novelty items, and this could go big.

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This is Animal Crossing in real life. The price might be a little steep but you can easily recoup your money after selling it for a profit a few years down the road but with all the Hi-Def and what-not technology, we’re not sure it’s going to work then.

#23 Hairy Potter by Mattel?

At first glance, we thought this was the Wolfman who is still in the initial stages of his transformation. We could also imagine this to be a character from Harry Potter and we disagree with what the seller is saying. But it is just a doll, we suppose.

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This isn’t Merlin. We’ve seen Merlin onscreen several times and he has never looked like this at all. While we are perfectly aware we shouldn’t be so upset by this, we would only want a stereotypical, grey-bearded, and robed version of Merlin, thanks very much.

#24 The Christmas Grinch

Aside from Santa, one of the most popular Christmas characters is the Grinch. He’s not exactly your typical Christmas person but he learned his lesson in the end. But did you know that in the book the Grinch is black and white with pink eyes? We bet you didn’t know that.

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This pair of green Grinch gloves are guaranteed to not only scare little children asking for Christmas gifts, but would also keep your hands warm in style. The only problem we’re seeing with them is that they’re worth almost a hundred dollars.

#25 Would you play for a snowball?

A pair of snowballs for $10,000? That’s asking quite a lot but the seller says it’s not just your normal snowball. These are snowballs from the biggest snowfall history in New York City which happened in 2016. Convinced to buy?

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We bet more people are interested in the item to the left of the snowballs. It’s chocolate flavored, it’s creamy, and it’s ice-cold. Do you know what it is? It’s one of the best things you could ever have on a hot summer day.

#26 A gummy bear worth thousands

The small gummy candies we have come to lovingly know as gummy bears were a staple in our childhoods. We have fond memories of them and even when we became adults, we still love them. But this doesn’t mean we’re going to pay thousands for one.

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The first thing that came to mind when we saw this was, is the seller serious? $10,000 for a supposedly rare gummy bear and worm hybrid? Surely, this happens in the factories all the time. Also, how many hands have handled it?

#27 A dress fit for all the witches out there

If you’re a practicing Wiccan or just love the style, this dress was made for you. It’s a bit on the expensive side but we know that with all your magic, you can easily come up with $5,000 and cover the shipping costs. This would make a good costume for Halloween.

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It could also be worn when you need to concoct potions of different sorts. Not only is it an amazing replica, circa 1675, it also comes with real human hair. We’re just not sure about the source of the hair if it came from the witches or someone else.

#28 Zebra TV

This is something we could see being a great addition to a child’s playroom. Not only does the zebra seem like it would make a good toy, but it comes with a built-in 19-inch TV too. The only problem is it’s in black and white.

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Another thing that we can complain about it is that it costs $10,000. Perhaps it’s a better idea to just buy yourself the latest TV on the market and have someone encase it in a plush zebra. You’d save a lot of money and you’ll have the coolest TV out there too.

#29 Moschino cleaning powder backpack?

Priced at $599 and already on sale? So how much was the original price of this Moschino cleaning powder backpack, a thousand dollars? We’d say that’s a little too much. We love the trend of using household items as an inspiration for bags… usually.

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Why anyone would pay more than $500 to look like they are on their way to do their laundry is beyond us. You could get someone to fix you up with something similar for under $100. But to each their own. If we see you out and about with this, we’ll complement you; don’t worry.

#30 Fuzzy trousers

As fashion-forward as Carrie Bradshaw and her friends were, they each had their own styles. Which of them do you think would rock these? But we have to admit that this would go very well with that car with pink interior.

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Actually, we’re thinking that the owner of that car with the pink interiors and this pair of pants are one and the same. Her husband must have gone overboard for her last birthday and now she had so much pink stuff that she quickly unloaded a few items on eBay.

#31 Anyone want this handbag?

Ladies’ designer handbags can cost a lot of money. The Hermes Nilo Crocodile Himalayan Birkin is reported to cost $100,000 and that’s a lot of money indeed! We are not fortunate enough to get our hands on such a bag.

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We can only afford bags that cost less than a thousand dollars and we think that even that kind of price tag is already too much. Can we interest you ladies in a bag that costs only $100? It has the texture and looks of real bread too. Something like this is hard to come by; any takers?

#32 Do you want Apple on your feet?

When the word Apple is mentioned, the most common things people think about are iPhones and Macbooks. Who would have imagined that there are also Apple shoes? Yup, you heard that right; Apple sneakers to be specific. This pair is worth almost $20,000, or so the seller says.

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First off, this isn’t even on the same level as other more popular Italian brands such as Ferragamo or Gucci. Second, they’re incredibly dirty. If you have a spare $20,000 sitting in your bank account and you want to put some elbow grease into this, by all means, click “buy.”

#33 Spoon and toothbrush in one

Have you ever wondered, “What if my spoon doubled as a toothbrush?” Now you don’t have to because you can have this. This spoon toothbrush comes from Weidlich Sterling. The spoon company has been around for hundreds of years.

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That perhaps explains why their silverware is expensive. However, we don’t care if it’s a known brand or not, we can’t get over the fact that it’s a used toothbrush. We’re not going to pay money for anything used that comes in or near another’s mouth.

#34 Made in Kentucky! Yeah!

Why are we not surprised that this was built in Kentucky? We’re already expecting them to come up with something that we won’t be able to find anywhere else and they didn’t disappoint. Unveiling the Recline-O-Cycle for almost $3,000.

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There’s a place for you to put your drinks and food and you can sit back and relax as you move around and order people to get you more cold ice cream. Most people on the internet think it’s priced quite high. At best we’d pay $500 for the scooter and $200 for the chair.

#35 Sphynx cat doll

Now, this is another item that belongs to the nightmare category. It should be in the same group as the monkey dolls. It’s quite big at 18 inches and the seller says it is made of soft silicone, plus it has clothes on.

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We’re just a bit glad that it comes with clothes because it would be very weird if it did not. the price is pretty specific but we suspect that the seller factored in the shipping costs down to the literal penny.

#36 Would you like to see the world through the US map?

How would it feel to see the world through the US map? These sunglasses come in silver grey color so people won’t be able to know exactly what you are looking at. We’re just wondering why they’re priced so high, but it’s an odd product. Anyone that wants it bad enough would pay top dollar.

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These sunglasses may have all the inland states covered but we’re in a state of shock as to how they could leave out Hawaii and Alaska. We’ll just stick with our $20 red, white, and blue sunglasses for the next Fourth of July.

#37 Vintage face drawers

This drawer won’t be afraid to give you the look if you don’t organize the contents well. You better Marie Kondo your things in this one or it’s gonna make faces that you won’t like and that’s something you don’t want to happen.

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We’d like to commend the seller for being honest because at least he admitted that the box is ridiculous. And even if the seller hadn’t written it right there for all to see, we would have guessed this was from the 1960s. We’ve seen plenty of weird things from that era.

#38 The pink telephone

In yet another listing from the same lady who owned the pink car interiors and the pink pants, we have the fuzzy pink telephone. She’s unloading her household. We hope she kept back at least one or two of her unique items for herself.

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Someone out there will gladly take all of these fuzzy pink things and give them a happy, Pepto Bismol-colored home. Even if they don’t have a landline, we’re sure this unique phone can adorn one of their many knickknack shelves.

#39 The glittering cowboy

This is something you could get Grandpa so he can join the annual Halloween festivities for seniors. We believe he’d love it and he’ll have a fun time parading around in this glittery number because it’d sure to get everyone’s attention.

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This authentic, vintage, handmade costume is worth almost $300 but if you’re ever going to splurge in Grandpa, this is the best time to do so. This piece is rare, the chances of seeing anyone on the street or at the mall wearing the same thing is next to nil.

#40 Fake it till you make it

If you can’t toss fried rice from the wok as many professional cooks do, this is the next best thing. You can impress guests at home with your fried rice tossing skills with this one but at more than a thousand dollars, this is a hard sell.

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Pricey ricey, we like to say. It can be displayed like a trophy in your kitchen but we doubt anyone would be willing to fork out a thousand for something that they can’t get a lot of use out of except for Instagram shots.

#41 A spool of natural golden spider silk

When we look at this, we can’t help but think of Rumpelstiltskin. We can imagine him sitting on the spinning wheel and turning straw into gold and the spool in the photo as his finished product. If this was Rumpelstiltskin’s, we’d say it’s a steal at $159.

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However, this supposedly rare natural golden spider silk looks just like your ordinary thread and there’s nothing special about this one. For $159, we can buy plenty of regular thread in many different colors. Pass on this one, we say.

#42 What does LV have to do with soccer?

LV is the last brand we’d associate with soccer, or as the rest of the world calls it, football. What does the fashion giant have to do with the sport? We would have said the answer is nothing before seeing this. But if you’re going to carry your soccer ball everywhere, carry it in style.

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The seller is putting it up for sale for almost $3,000 but if it doesn’t have any accompanying certificate and it isn’t in mint condition, it’s not going to fetch that much of a price. Plus, you can’t even use it to play with your friends.

#43 Getting rid of his pig collection

We’d like to send kudos to this man for having the guts to get rid of his hoard and clean his home. He’s got a huge pig collection that he doesn’t have enough room for. He’s saying goodbye to them to the tune of $10,000.

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He’s gonna bring home the bacon if he can sell all of his stuff. Imagine adding $10,000 to your bank account. He’s been hogging those pigs for a long time and it’s time to say goodbye. We trust his judgment on this one.

#44 Don’t sit on it

How would you like to sit on this one while doing your business? Careful there buddy or you could injure your derriere. Designed with barbed wires it looks a little disturbing but what disturbs us more is the color of the toilet seat.

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It’s turned yellowish from years of use, we think and as the years go by, it’s gonna get even more yellowish and look unpleasant. We don’t want our house guests to think that we don’t clean so we’re not going to take this one.

#45 A flower terrarium footstool

Look at those yellow daisies! Why would you want to put your feet up on something that has flowers in it? We would be worried we’d put too much weight on it and it would break. We would just set it safely on a shelf and admire it.

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This may be vintage and mid-century but it’s just not worth $200 to us. No sense spending energy and time trying to inflate a footstool only to not be able to relax because you risk ruining the flowers. The fake flowers…