30+ Hilariously Weird Photos That Capture The Entertainment Quality Of The Subway
Naturally, strange things tend to happen in dark lonely places where few people tend to congregate. Or so we thought. We could never have imagined that, of all places, the subway, which thousands of people use in commuting every single day, would be home to strange, curious, and downright funny sights and even funnier people.
Thankfully, everyone and their mother has a smartphone these days, and whenever something remotely funny happens, you can be sure to catch it on the perilous yet exciting streets of the internet! As a charming treat for you, we decided to compile a hysterical list of outrageous happenings spotted on the subway. Seeing as these happen fairly often, you’ll probably see one of these firsthand soon enough!
Therapist in training?
We’ve all seen Baby Geniuses and Home Alone. Those movies prove that kids can be more intelligent than we give them credit for. That said, a tween giving emotional advice to grown-ups on the subway is unheard of. He must be really advanced for his age, with wisdom beyond his years.
Even Albert Einstein, one of the most famous geniuses to ever live, must have had some difficulty understanding emotions at eleven. However, if these photos are to be believed, he must know his stuff! We would like to know where his parents are, though.
A Robber on the Subway
We know there was a time when balaclavas were all the rage, but it’s gone. If we got to the subway and saw this, we would panic and immediately find another way to get to work. Surely, he could have found a friendlier-looking way to warm up!
A clever thief would lose the mask to blend in, so we think that this guy kept his mask on because he was just too cold and hoped everyone would just ignore him. The shocking thing is, they actually did.
Outsmarting the Fox
Aside from thief-looking passengers, the subway has also been used by wild animals, apparently. Foxes, just like this one, can appear docile, but they’re also menacing. We don’t know how the woman sitting next to this little fox managed to snooze because we’d be too nervous to even breathe properly!
We know some people keep them as pets. However, we doubt we would have the courage needed to pet one of these babies. They have their cute moments, but they can also be high-maintenance. We hope the little guy had a fun day out, at the very least.
The First Time never goes well.
Everyone goes through an awkward first time in most things. This young schoolgoer had a pretty rough one if this picture is anything to go by. If you can’t already tell, he somehow got his hair caught between the doors.
Though we can’t tell how it happened, we kind of feel sorry for him. Maybe he was scared that his peers would mock him if he called for help, but no one noticed. Well, except for the person who took this photo.
Peacock at the Subway
Next, we have another pet lover who just couldn’t resist showing off at the subway. Guys, we get it, animals are adorable, but you just can’t bring them everywhere you go. Or so mum said when we wanted to bring our shiny new pet rabbit to school when we were little!
We wonder where the guy was going with this peacock. It certainly can’t be an office job so maybe the zoo? Our other question is, why is no one staring at the magnificent creature? Their Instagram feeds can’t be more interesting.
Emulating Sleeping Beauty
If Sleeping Beauty was a man, this guy would be perfect for the role. We know it wasn’t intentional, but with that pose, he really looks like that famous painting. Judging by how deeply asleep he is, we reckon he had quite the night.
Most of us are guilty of nodding off on the subway, but this is more than that. He didn’t just nod off; he took off his shirt and shoes before using the legs of a stranger as a pillow—the perfect setup. At least for him. Not so much for the stranger.
Treebeard, is that you?
If we lived in the fictional world of The Lord of the Rings, a man with a tree head would be nothing to look at twice. But since we live on planet Earth and not Middle Earth, we found this very odd indeed.
If he was trying to hide a bad hair day, a balaclava like the one we saw before would be a better way to go. More puzzling is the fact that everyone is so engrossed in their phones and books that no one is paying him the slightest bit of attention!
Yes, we see him too. And if it were Halloween, it would have been completely normal. If it were midnight and there was a full moon, we would have raised an eyebrow but still conceded. But on the morning train into the city? We need answers.
He looks cool, calm, collected, and quite casual, scrolling through his phone without a care. Listen, times are hard, and even werewolves need to get that bread. At least he shaved and put on a nice tie. Looking good there, buddy.
Just because we’ve decided to compile a list of weird things on the subway doesn’t mean we can explain them all. Judging by the two ladies next to the Woman in Black, they had a theme when deciding what to wear to the club.
We think we see cat ears atop her head too. Before anyone says Kim Kardashian is the only one who can pull this off, they have to acknowledge that this is a bona fide trendsetter. We just hope she can breathe well under there.
Like my hat?
Since no one else had raincoats or umbrellas, let’s assume this must be a fashion statement. If we were the man sitting next to him, we might have asked a few questions. Why this leaf? Is it your favorite? Do you wear a different leaf every day?
We are operating under the assumption that he is, in fact, aware that he has a leaf on his head. The tiny smile on his face tells us he does and is waiting rather impatiently to be asked about it!
Since PlayStation kicked things up a notch in the 2000s, the world has seen more gamers than patriots. We didn’t know there were more YouTube videos about gaming than anything else, but apparently, that’s the reality. You have to give the people what they want.
The amount of dedication, not to mention the strength, this took to pull off is actually impressive. Typically, on a long commute, most people, including us, scroll through our timelines, watch a movie or read. This guy is ten steps ahead of us!
Turtle on a Leash
We know we all love our pets, and nothing is more gratifying than the feeling of having them next to you. After reading that, we’re certain most people are now fantasizing about snuggling with their fluffy cats and dogs or maybe taking them out to play.
This man is simply another pet owner who can’t imagine leaving his turtle anywhere alone. Or, maybe he simply wanted to show off his awesome turtle everywhere he went. Unfortunately, everyone was busy on their phones (as usual) and missed this epic runway show.
This is why you don’t gamble with money meant for your plane ticket. These Brazil fans landed in Russia thinking they’d win the World Cup, meaning they’d stay long, but things didn’t go their way, and they found themselves heading back home earlier than expected.
We admire that they kept their costumes on to keep their spirits up. That’s more than the national team had when they left. But when you’re a real fan, you don’t throw in the inflated dinosaur costume when your team loses. You take it on your chin!
Rehearsing in the Subway
We’ve seen a lot of people panic because of an important test or presentation, but we have never seen such dedication. Even after weeks of research and reading, these young men still had to bring a desk so they could prepare on the train.
They are clearly ready for whatever they’re on their way to face. We wonder if the guy in the gray suit is the team leader; he oozes confidence. And he whipped out the desk, after all. Dude clearly knows what he’s doing.
Before you say anything, we would like to inform you that this is not one of those villains from Power Rangers. She’s just a young lady who got her wires crossed. Or perhaps she couldn’t decide which headband to wear that day.
Her choice of an old computer monitor is certainly an eclectic one, but it’s worthy of a high-fashion runway! Normally, we would ask how her head fit in there, but we’ll pass this time. It’s not right to question someone’s creative process out of nowhere like that!
Daring the Cops in the Subway
Knowing fully well the CCTV on the subway is working and the cops are actively watching them, this woman came in with a sarcastic message for everyone to see. This is the kind of thing we would have bought with all our allowance at Hot Topic as teenagers!
This was in China, so a couple of people might have missed out on the joke. But we love the idea of her making eye contact with someone who got it, tossing her sunglasses over her eyes, and strutting away with a smirk!
Those of us who have to ride the subway know that people invade your personal space all the time. Most of us just deal, turning our frustrations into a hilarious inner monologue, and then we forget about it by dinnertime.
This girl might have been new in the city, but she was not new to subway drama. She was fully aware of what kind of shenanigans took place. She brought with her an ironclad cube, and now we’re just jealous we didn’t think of it first!
Lady Gaga impersonator on the Subway
On our commute, the type of people we typically ride with are those you would never even look twice at or even notice. But some people stick out, and even if no one pays them any mind, we like to take the time to notice these colorful characters.
This Lady Gaga-inspired look is one for the books. How can someone look so out of place yet so comfortable at the same time is beyond us. This proves that there is no shortage of artistry in this world if you’re looking for it, even on the subway.
Genius in the Subway
This was a genius move worthy of accolades. Few people would think of it, let alone pull it off. This man is not disturbing anyone. He’s simply hanging his head in this contraption he brought so he could enjoy a refreshing nap on the way to the office.
That’s the thing with geniuses. While every other person will step off with a sore neck, he’ll be waking up with a smile. All because he took what looks to us like nothing more than a laundry bag and made a hammock.
This woman was taking no chances. To avoid being in contact with people, she drove her mini-crosser right into the subway car. This is just our two cents, but this woman is a trailblazer. She is definitely the boss of her own life.
We want to earn our stripes, and she needs to be the one to teach us how to go through life, keeping it real. We’re not going to start driving tiny cars around anywhere we please, but this is the kind of energy we want to channel!
The Royal Duck
There is no seal or crown indicating this duck belongs to a royal family, but look at how majestically it carries itself. No ordinary duck could command such presence. Even the famous and dignified like to feel like regular folk (fowl?) every now and again.
And so he went on a little subway adventure for the afternoon. Unlike most of the other passengers we’ve seen thus far, this handsome guy turned quite a few heads. How could he not with his charm and fabulous feathers?
We almost thought this lady had been robbed! That someone swapped her pet for a pineapple. But that was before we saw her singing and cooing to it! Just kidding; we never actually saw that happen, but nothing could surprise us anymore on the subway.
In today’s world, what is considered a pet to some people is seen as food to others. The reverse can be true as well. We all have that friend with a million plant babies that they have named and have daily chats with. This is simply another level of that!
Health is Wealth
This man was headed to a job interview but suddenly got a call that it was offered to someone else. Instead of getting upset, he pulled out his handy dandy table and had his lunch right then and there. What a man!
Here is another person who has his head on straight and knows how to use his time wisely. His table is small and out of the way, so he is able to eat calmly and without making a mess of his clothes. Who has time to queue at a food truck?
Long Way Back Home
This cute little puppy usually took the subway home with her owner, but on this day, she was looking to find some alone time on the midnight train to Brooklyn. We trust her keen doggy senses got her home safely.
Imagine the glorious reunion between this pupper and her fur mom. New York City is exciting, and though we have no idea what circumstances led to this, we are sure she got a kick out of her late-night train experience.
The Fifth Element
This classic Bruce Willis movie from 1997 will always be a hit no matter how many times you watch it. Do you know how we know? Because people are still fangirling enough to dress up as the alien from the film, like this lady here.
She’s gotta be a fan. There’s no way an alien went shopping and decided to take the subway back home. They probably have more sophisticated means of getting from one place to another. However, if you see any unusual lights in the subway, don’t hesitate to call Homeland!
Another sci-fi fan
We know what you’re thinking. So are we. A fellow Sci-Fi fan! Whoever took this picture clearly loved this guy’s homage to Alien, and when he noticed, he stayed completely calm and in character. Epic. These are our cosplaying goals!
What prompted him to wear it on the subway is a question with many answers, but only the guy could have answered. Our guess is the creature is guiding him to wherever it fancies. To a show, perhaps? Face-sucking aliens love the theater too!
Color war gone wrong
This man is another reason why you shouldn’t agree to a color war if you’re a sore loser. There is no real winner when you’re just horsin’ around with your friends, but he took it pretty hard when his team lost.
He was so upset that he left his shirt. And shoes. His friends definitely had his back – and the rest of his stuff – and, after a thorough round of teasing, probably returned all his belongings and let him win at a game of poker. Poor guy.
Hats off to this man who went all the way across town to drop this lamp he picked out at Goodwill for his grandma. He saw this classic piece and said to himself, “You know who would love that? Granny! Her old lamp is busted anyways.”
Look at him, keeping a tight hold on his special gift while messaging his wife about why he’s going to be late for dinner. This is the kind of wholesomeness we like to see on our ride home after a long day at the office.
The Old-School sleeping Technique
This older man has a habit of falling asleep everywhere he goes, and because of it, he has figured out how to get the most bang for his buck. Or rest for his snore. So when the lights became too much, he chose innovation.
Think about it; it’s not sleeping if you don’t see him sleeping. It might not be the best move, but it’s effective nonetheless. At least no one would dare go to his pocket. Not with him sitting upright like that!
With age comes Wisdom
The struggle to find a seat on the subway can be tough and intense. You can easily get shoved aside if you’re not strong enough. However, this older man was not ready to go through all of that stress, so he came prepared.
Rather than battle it out with explosive teenagers, he waited till the battle was over and all the seats were taken before walking in with his chair. They won’t admit it, but a lot of people felt jealous after watching him sit comfortably.
How she didn’t know she was sitting next to The Mask is beyond us. Who wouldn’t recognize this guy? Especially when he’s smiling sneakily like that. Seeing how he’s quietly sitting beside her, he must be up to something shady.
The Mask is never calm or quiet. Everyone knows that. There’s always a gimmick to pull, whether it’s swallowing a bomb, conjuring up toys, or stretching his body in unbelievable shapes. If there was a kid nearby, this definitely made their day!
Transporting What in the Subway?
Surely, you don’t really think that box is filled with sperm. Of all the places he could have gone to for sperm donation, he picked the subway. Why would anyone want to donate their sperm in the subway, of all places?
Jokes aside, this must have been a shocking sight to the passengers that day. People who transport any kind of biological material never use public transportation. Or at least that’s what we thought. Could he be carrying some kind of contraband in there?
Keeping his Daughter Safe
While most people are busy packing on awards, degrees, and milestones, this man is busy packing his daughter. As insane as this looks, we can’t blame him. He’s only trying to protect her and let her sleep. The subway can be a scary place.
Considering everything we’ve seen happening in the subway, bagging up your kids might just be the way to go. Plus, we all know that kids like to wander. If you’re not vigilant enough to always have them within your sight, they could get lost. She seems kinda uncomfortable, though.
My bees, man
We have to hand it to this guy. He really takes saving the bees seriously. Look at that impressive setup. It’s a shame he’s on the subway with it, though. What if it falls? We shudder thinking about that, honestly.
We have so many questions we will never get answers to because this guy disappeared with his bees as soon as he got to his stop. Guess he needed to show them around so they could find more flowers. You keep fighting the good fight, beekeeper.
All Hallow’s Eve
We love Halloween a lot, and apparently, this guy in New York does, too. He really poured his soul into this costume. We bet this must have been the best live performance any of the passengers had heard in a long time.
Is this Fiddler on the Wolf? Honestly, we don’t actually know if this was Halloween or not. Maybe this is just the guy’s aesthetic. But we’re here for it, and we hope we run into him one day, hopefully not during a full moon.
New style on the subway
After reading this far, we’re sure you will admit that you can and will meet all kinds of people on the subway. It doesn’t take a genius to know which group this person belongs to. Yet again, everyone seems to be minding their business and ignoring him.
Just when we thought we had seen it all, a grown-up adult on the subway put on a pair of lacy undies on top of their jeans. Let’s hope there were no kids on board. You don’t want them picking up bad habits or, worse, asking uncomfortable questions!
Trust no one on the subway
Sometimes, even your friend isn’t your friend. The door caught this young lady’s hair, and even though a bunch of people saw it, including her friend, they decided to have a laugh rather than inform her. She had to ride like that until she got to her stop!
The pain was excruciating, especially when the train moved. It was like her scalp was about to come off. People can be wicked for no good reason. Though it’s painful to admit, it’s every man for himself on the subway.
Be Careful who you smile at
It’s a rough world we live in. We know it’s hard to always be on your toes, but try to pay attention to anything suspicious and keep a low profile when you’re around unfamiliar people. This man did the complete opposite of everything we just said.
Like you may already suspect, he was hanging and smiling around a person with very strange hobbies and habits. This picture of him smiling was the only thing the cops found when they got to the subway. Just kidding! He’s probably fine.
Remember to hold the rails
We know what it looks like, and believe us when we tell you that this guy is indeed doing Yoga on the train. Being this flexible and agile is hard enough on solid ground, so we can’t imagine the expertise this guy possesses to do it here.
To be honest, this is quite dope! Apparently, the man has been doing these kinds of exercises and poses on trains for several years. After a long day at work, this is the kind of wholesome stuff we like to see because it brings us back to ourselves.
The High Priestess
Some people might disagree and call her a queen, but there is no way a queen would take the subway. Plus, we don’t think a queen would be going around with a bunch of fancy chopsticks sticking out of her hair.
Looks like even priestesses use the subway. Whatever happened to all those stories that they could fly? Unlike how she’s dressed, she seems to be embracing modernization more than we thought. She’s even using an iPhone to scroll through her socials!
The thing about magic is it’s hard to explain, and you don’t often realize it until it is too late. But still, you’d expect everyone to recognize Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, especially with his very long white beard.
What are the chances that you’d commute with the lookalikes of Severus Snape, Harry Potter, Professor McGonagall, and Dumbledore all on the same day? One out of a billion, easily. They may have seen Voldemort, but at least it’s not Umbridge!
The Night before Monday
We’re all this man, and this man is all of us. The thought of the next day being Monday can be very disheartening. You just know that you’re about to enter a new week of limited sleep and rest. But he was ready!
Knowing fully well what awaited him in the following week, he decided to get the most out of every minute. It didn’t matter if it was on the subway or in an Uber; he was ready to pass out. We salute you, pillow man.
Mirror of Truth
In this unusual scenario, we have an unlikely and unknowing hero. When he walked in with his mirror, he didn’t know just how crucial it would be. Who would have thought a mirror on the subway would be the thing to save you from an embarrassing situation?
The lesson here isn’t to start walking around with mirrors, but it definitely helped this lady out. What we should learn from this is to always double-check your outfit before leaving the house. Also, quiet heroes are much more admirable.